I edited the post a bit on 2/28/09. This is Emilee's sister-in-law, Jennie, updating this post. David asked me to help out until he and Emilee can write their own post. I'll give a brief update of the events of the past few days.
Emilee chose to end chemotherapy treatments and to use hospice care. It is defined as follows: "Hospice care is suitable when you no longer benefit from cancer treatment and you are expected to live 6 months or less. Hospice gives you palliative care, which is treatment to help relieve cancer-related symptoms, but not cure the disease; its main purpose is to improve your quality of life. You, your family, and your doctor decide together when hospice care should begin."
Hospice also covers pain control symptoms, mediation between doctors, nurses, therpists, etc., home care, family counseling, bereavement, etc. if that is what David and Emilee decide in their plan. Basically, it is a service in the home that will help Emilee be comfortable and manage her health needs as well as providing support for the family.
Emilee went to the doctor's for more pain management relief -it's been a tough few days and she has had to take extra pain medication to remain comfortable. She is groggy at times. If you would like to visit, please call before and see if it is a good time to come over -she really enjoys it and it lifts her spirits as well as those in the rest of the family.
David mentioned the doctor removed 2 liters of fluid from her abdomen today. Her swelling in the stomach is still very apparent but the swelling in her hands and face looked better than past times I've seen her.
I'll keep you posted as David and Emilee direct me to do so. You can e-mail me at jkilstrom@gmail.com if you have further questions. Also, the blog background has been acting wacky lately, so bear with me until the problem is solved. Thank you for your thoughts, prayers, comments, visits, and acts of kindness. They are felt and keep everyone afloat. -Jennie Kilstrom
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10 comments:
Emilee: I have sit here for a very long time now, just typing and retyping a message of comfort to you, but I can not find the right words. I have now decided there are no "right words" to say. But know that we continue to pray for you, and will now pray that you may have peace and comfort, and your pain may be tolerable. Love to you and your family. Kathy Ivins
Glen A. Dolberg, Emilee's dad, says that Jenny is right about the site not cooperating. It didn't recognize me this time for some reason.
The following describes our love and concerns from my perspective:
Dearest Emilee and ALL,
Emilee's mother and I have been arriving in the home in time to get everyone up, breakfasted, and off to school & work each day) and we have been leaving the home around 9 p.m. every day.
Although Jenny thankfully reported things very nicely and very appropriately, it has not been our experience that Emilee is any longer able to receive visitors very comfortably.
We were glad to have been present when the hospice folks met with the family. They were two lovely ladies whose skill, professionalism, and loving kindness were not only very evident but also very much appreciated.
We express our GREAT LOVE to Emilee and we say a BIG THANKS to everyone who joins us as we try to encircle Emilee and her family in the arms of the strongest embrace of LOVE that we can muster.
Always LOVE from DAD!
P.S. Telephoning the Ellis home before coming for a visit is probably best.
My hope and prayers are here for you today and always. My you all feel the full measure of the blessings of the spirit at this time.
Emilee and I were classmates in high school. Even though we have not kept in contact these past 20 years since high school, I have always considered her my friend.
I have continued to check updates on this blog since I first realized Emilee was going through cancer and had a blog spot.
My mother had breast cancer and I have witnessed the pain and discomfort that one goes through.
Emilee: You are one of the strongest people I know in faith and spirit. While you went through this journey, your sharing of your experiences has made us even more in awe of you.
You are in our prayers every day. Know that we care about you greatly (speaking as a representative of the Edison High School Class of 1989) - Marie Salcedo
Dear Emilee and Family:
Please know that my heart and prayers are with you as you now go through this very difficult time.
I pray that God' blessings and peace will be with you and that somehow He will bless you with a feeling of acceptance for what is otherwise an horrible and tragic situation. I know that in spite of all that can happen to us there is a loving God that will make things right eventually and I pray that you will be blessed with that feeling in your heart.
Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers constantly.
With love,
Amedee
I know that making any change can be a difficult change. You have been in my thoughts and prayers ever since I have met you. Even one time for a very short amount of moments, you have made a huge impact on my life. You have been with this 'companion' for a long time now and you are still making the difficult decisions. I am proud to know you and just wish I were strong enough to help with physical things that you might be struggling with. I think you are handling the mental and emotional parts as well as you possibly can. By the way, not have known you with your own hair...you have made a great choice with the wig and I would have never guessed it to be a wig if you hadn't told me. The liver is such a tempermental organ and it likes to express itself with 'bloating' and ascites, to let everyone know that it is not feeling up to par. It can also be quite painful. The one thing that I have found that I like with this life is that if we choose a path to walk and if we decide that wasn't the right choice for today or ever...we can change our minds and choose another path. When we have proven ourselves ready, the gates open and we can take the path back to our Heavenly Father. Some people have related to me that they have started on the path and the timing wasn't right but they were given the choice to stay or go back to earth to continue on with the earthly experience. Choosing Hospice doesn't have to be a final decision but...but... it can be a right choice. Most hospice people have the knowledge of how to make the journey more comfortable.
As I said, you have been a part of my life since I met you in group and if you are like me sometimes prayer is the best way to help. My 'support group' of family and friends and their prayers have kept me going. Good luck and may Heavenly Father smile down on you. He knows where your heart is and he knows how hard it is to be the mom and ill trying to be the best mom that you can be. The boys know it too, I am sure.
Good luck. If you ever need someone that is less qualified than you to talk to etc. please feel free to contact me. email is sufis2005@gmail.com and cell phone is 801-244-1616. Sometimes especially in the middle of the night it is hard to disturb the ones you love just to talk to...don't hesitate to call. I am usually up late and going back to sleep is usually not a problem.
Sue Fisk
Emilee,
I know you are making the right choice, I hope you know you and your family are always in our prayers and thoughts! Your are the strongest, sweetest, most positive person I have ever met. You will impact my life forever! I really want to come over and visit you. I will call first, and hope you will be up to a visit! Please, if you need anything let me know. Love You Heidi Pearce
Emiliee, David and boys, We love you and pray you will be comforted and at peace now that this decision has been made. There was no reason to subject yourself to more physical problems than you already have with the pain etc if it wasn't going to help you. Enjoy the loving arms of your extended family and church family as we circle you with love and pray for you all. Your sweet spirit Emilee has taught us all that leaving this mortal world can be done with dignity and strength .
We love you and when it is time for you to cross over and pass through the veil we know that there will be many open arms waiting for you. I can just picture your Grandpa and Grandma Baer with their wonderful smiles waiting to guide you. The most marvellous thing will be that you will feel the pain no more. We will all miss you but know that we will see you again!!
Hugs and love, Beth and David Street Katy,Erik Lucy and Amy as well!!
Lots of people when they stand in church to bear their testimony begin with "I remember the day the missionaries called!" I remember the lessons they taught, telling me about the Plan of Salvation and God's plan for my life and how I had promised in the Spirit world to live the life He had planned. And, when I lived my life on earth it was to be the way back to Him. The missionaries brought puppet figures to demonstrate the journey from the Spirit World and back; how death was overcome by gaining a spirit body and the progress from passing through the veil to the Celestial Kingdom. Maybe now you have to look back to look forward; remember the peace you gained from the Blessing organised by President Monson and the words of Brigham Young "All is well!" Shortly before my dad died he said he could see those family and friends who had died and very happily he said "They are waiting for me!" You will never be alone Emilee. Be peaceful. Love Ruth (UK)
Much love to you Emilee, David, the boys and your parents and brothers at this time. Thinking of you so much. If there's anything we can do from New York, please let me know. Know our thoughts and prayers are with you.
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